You've Got To Be Kidding . . . . .

BMW M3 GTS sells out less than three months after its release



"BMW’s new M3 GTS has only been in the market for close to three months yet somehow, all the available models have been wiped out of the dealerships. Yep, according to Dr. Kay Segler, the head of BMW’s M Division, the BMW M3 GTS has officially sold out."

(TopSpeed)

Apple's Newest Monster Is Alive . . . . .

Apple's official iPad video, specs page



(TUAW)

Poor Guy . . . . .

Ask a Counselor: My Wife is Abusive and Sexually Frigid

I will try to make this as short as possible but to the point. My wife and I are both Christians. We have been married 16 years. She was a virgin when we married and STILL is today, 16+ years later. Yes, you read that correct, we have never had sex.

My wife is also very verbally abusive, all the classic signs, I never do anything right, name calling, everything is my fault, etc. and she does not think there is anything wrong with her, it is all me.

I guess I have stayed this long because for most of our marriage we were in church leadership and I did not want to be seen as a hypocrite, as I am not a fan of divorce and did not want to set a “bad” example.

We have been out of leadership for about 3 years and I’m at the point of leaving. When confronted she may be a little better for a couple of weeks, but then goes to back to her old ways.

She has no desire for me sexually, anything sexual has always been her being pleased. In fact she has stated numerous times, touching me in a sexual way is DISGUSTING. Her idea of counseling is that I go – because I need help. So what to do?

See the response here (Guidance2Live)

They Are Just Taking Advantage Of The Opportunity . . . . .

(Imgur)

Who Ever Made This Is Crying Out For Some Help . . . . .

(Imgur)

Disclaimer - Doing This Requires A Lot More Work Than You Think . . . . .

Four Keys To Giving Great Oral

BUT THERE IS ONE THING MISSING FROM ALL THIS

As with all the physical sex techniques I teach, I’m showing you this with a disclaimer. And that disclaimer is:

These techniques will not work very well if you don’t understand how to turn her on psychologically as well as what physical strokes to use. The only time I can guarantee she’ll have multiple orgasms is when you understand how to psychologically arouse her, AND you know the right “moves” physically.

So, how do you psychologically arouse a woman so you can make her cum?

The most important thing that you can learn about arousing a woman on the psychological level is to learn what her four mental orgasm triggers are. Once you learn what these are, making her cum will be as easy as flipping a switch or pressing a button. And when you know great physical techniques ON TOP OF THIS, you’re going to be an unstoppable Sex God.

(TSBMagazine)

Just In Case The Alcohol Isn't Enough Of A Booster . . . . .

Surprising Aphrodisiac Foods For Valentine’s Day

Arugula. Heralded for its aphrodisiac qualities since the first century A.D., arugula will go perfectly in your first course dinner salad.

Pine Nuts. High in zinc (like oysters) pine nuts are also credited with romantic abilities because they’re so labor intensive to harvest. This Crusted Rack of Venison sounds like an excellent main dish.

Bananas. Thanks to their high potassium and vitamin B levels bananas are a serious feel-good food. Try this easy but luxe dessert recipe for Bananas Foster.

Chili Peppers. Boost your metabolism, speed up your heart rate, and stimulate endorphins. If you can’t fit them in to a main dish entree consider this unique Spicy Hot Chocolate recipe for a little late-night snuggling by the fire.

(Twirlit)

To Play With The Big Boys You Gotta Know The Basics . . . . .

Dating Out of Your League

How you can instantly step up your game

Dispense with the notion of leagues

This is kind of like the power of The Secret, but less ridiculous. It’s true that if you’re hung up on a girl being out of your league, you’ll surely fall prey to the self-fulfilling prophecy and your unfulfilled privates will be left to their own devices.

A lot of people will suggest you picture a girl naked, but that’s not going to work here because that’s really just like throwing a 100,000 foot brick wall in the way of your being comfortable around her initially. Instead, imagine her in other, non-sexy embarrassing situations. The best thing you can get her to do is to reveal an embarrassing story from her past. Once her humanity is revealed, your subconscious will recognize that she is not a velvet-lined sex robot from the future, but just a woman.

Act like you been there

Beautiful women know they are beautiful. And, unless they’re in the same category as Charlize Theron in “Arrested Development,” they’re likely tired of being smothered with visual molestations and stuttering comments. If you want to tell her she’s beautiful, pick one specific thing about her that you like, tell her it’s lovely, and move on. Everybody knows she looks good, so offer a succinct compliment and move on. It’s like this…but less so:

Cultivate a unique value

Woody Allen isn’t the most handsome man in the world. We’ve never seen him without a artfully dischevevled button-up, pearing over too-thick glasses, but we’re guessing Larry King isn’t exactly washing his t-shirts on his abs. Yet, beautiful women are attracted to these men (and others like them) because they know what they’ve got and they run with it. It’s probably no accident that both of those men have money, but we’ll argue that girls like them and they have money because they’ve got talent in another department.

Larry King is a first class journalist and cultural icon. Woody Allen is a game-changing filmmaker and bohemian darling. They both know it. They both work it like a stripper works the chrome. Find out what your chrome is. Ask former girlfriends and current girl-friends. They’ll let you know what your Trump (another one) cards are so you can play them. When she realizes you’re helping her and making her life better, she’ll want to keep you around.

Show your guts

As many important men have suggested, confidence is your most becoming accessory. Stand with a straight back and your shoulders back. Don’t fidget with your clothes or change your posture to often. Speak slowly and evenly. If you spill a glass or drop a utensil, remain calm. Take everything you’d do normally, and do it at 75% speed. Eventually, ask to see them again for a movie or coffee. Don’t beg. If they refuse, don’t ask again, just politely end the conversation. They may come back later in the night that way, but they certainly won’t come back to a whiny puppy of a man.

Know your audience

If you’re after a supermodel, you’d better damn well know your way around a camera, around a set, and you better be dressed impeccably. If you’re going after a girl that can shred around 99% of the guys she skis with, you’d better be able to at least keep up. While it’s possible to date out of your league, you wouldn’t go into a genetics exam with three years of Italian under your belt (unless you’re one of these out-of-anybody’s-league girls…). Find out what she is into, and make sure you’ve got your bases covered in that area so you don’t look foolish.

A good example would be the following. Let’s say you’ve gotten a girl that is fluent in 3 languages to go on a date with you. Nice one. Now, it’s hard to do this kind of prep ahead of time without crossing into stalker territory, but a good prep for that first date is to have at least 3 movies in each non-English language under your belt. Just read the subtitles, internalize a favorite scene, and you’ll have conversational fodder for at least an hour.

(MadeMan)

Some Insight Into The Male Psyche . . . . .

What Men Think During (And After) One-Night Stands

Stage One: Anticipation
Men anticipate one-night stands almost constantly. If we go to a library to check out a book, our minds envision various scenarios in which a one-night stand with the kindly 76-year-old librarian would be possible.

When an actual one-night stand starts to happen though, we’re like dogs taking a car ride—all sense flies out the window, and instead of acting like the calm, suave figures of our imaginations, we begin salivating and panting while running in circles.

Stage Two: Fear
Once the act has started, fear sets in, mainly fear that we won’t be any good in bed. As soon as this fear begins, though, it gets dismissed. Hey, it’s a one-night stand! Who cares if we’re terrible?

Of course, we’ve still got to fear things, like pregnancy or STDs, so a responsible guy will always use a condom, even if the only one he can find is from a bar bathroom, about three sizes too small and printed with tiger stripes.

Stage Three: Shame
Usually a few seconds after orgasmic bliss, there’s some shame. Maybe not much, depending on the situation. Guys will feel a little ashamed if the whole experience lasted under a minute (good sex should last AT LEAST 2 minutes). They’ll also be ashamed of their Spider-Man sheets if they’re at home, or with the quality of the hotel if there’s no roof. It is important to point out that men are rarely ashamed of the woman they’ve slept with, unless they’re actually related to her.

Stage Four: Bragging
After a one-night stand is over, and usually after a few days have passed, guys will often go right into bragging mode. Convincing women to sleep with us is certainly reason for excessive pride, so dudes will talk to friends, brothers, internet forums, and occasionally take out small billboards to proclaim to the world that they’ve had sex.

(TheFrisky)

A Game To Enhance Your Political TV Viewing . . . . .

Asylum's State of the Union Drinking Game for President Obama's Address

The Ground Rules
Players: In the interest of bi-partisanship, Republicans and Democrats play by the same rules, and independents are the designated drivers. Sorry, you should have made up your minds by now. Democrats will take up a collection to buy all the booze, plus to pay for the booze the Republicans agreed to pay for under Bush, but didn't actually end up paying for. Republicans must complain and bring boxes of tea bags.

Beer Farts: Players must purchase "carbon credits," or be subject to fines for any greenhouse gas emissions. "He who smelt it, dealt it" and "Whoever denied it, supplied it" will not be considered valid defenses.

Barf Bags: Will be dispensed at $100 each. If you can't afford that, you'd better just hope you don't get sick.

Game Play
SOTU: The first time the network's chyron abbreviates the speech to SOTU, all players must sing, Spandau Ballet–style, "SOTU, funny how it seems ..." Anyone who forgets to sing must drink 1 shot.

Greeting Chug: As the president makes his way to the podium, he will inevitably be stopped in his tracks by some douche who thinks it's all about him, and will bogart the prez for an uncomfortably long greeting. All players must chug beer until President Obama disengages.

TelePrompTer Pong: Each team chooses a captain, and they stand on either side of the TV anticipating the president's teleprompter switches with ping-pong paddles. Whichever team misses has to drink a shot.

Phrases: Every drinking game has certain phrases that you have to drink after, but we're in a recession here. To save money, we're not going to make you drink every time the president says, "Fight for the middle class" or "Let me be absolutely clear."

Instead, each team will line up and take turns ad-libbing a kicker for each phrase. For example, if the president says, "Let me be absolutely clear ..."

You say: "... unlike a Mark McGwire urine sample."

President says: "Three-year discretionary spending freeze ..."

You say: "Rock! Freeze! Rock! Get higher, baby, get higher, baby ..."

If you fail to make a funny kicker, you drink.

Standing Ovation: Unless the president somehow hits a walk-off home run, he's going to get about 14 standing ovations that he probably doesn't deserve. Again, it's a recession, so when this happens, one team must yell "Sit!" and the other team yells "The f**k!" and then the first team yells "Down!" Mess it up, and you all drink.

"You Lie!": Two parts here. First, anyone who tries to be funny by yelling "You lie!" after the president says something has to drink backwash. It's just a hack move.

Second, there's a good chance someone else will try Rep. Joe Wilson's lucrative stunt, so when somebody heckles Obama, the first guy to pause the DVR and guess the name of the offender gets all the leftover booze.

Story Time: Anyone still conscious by the time the president gets around to introducing the uplifting, heroic guests in the gallery gets to test their response time here. Whenever the president ticks off one of their accomplishments, all players must shout, in unison, "On a BOAT!" Miss, and you all drink.

President: "She cared for hundreds of orphans ..."

You: "On a BOAT!"

President: "... saved up enough money to go to college ..."

You: "On a BOAT!"

President: "... was able to manage a successful boat dealership ..."

You: "On a BOAT!"

(AOL)

She's The Unicorn Of Cougars . . . . .

The Nameless Cougar



More pictures here (CougarPatrol)

Today's Linguistic Lesson - Austrailian Lingo . . . . .

A-Z Of Australian Slang

A

Ace! : Excellent! Very good!
Aerial pingpong : Australian Rules football
Amber fluid : beer
Ambo : ambulance, ambulance driver
Ankle biter : small child
Arvo : afternoon
Aussie salute : brushing away flies with the hand

Complete list here (DJMick)

A Small Reason Why Guys Love Sports . . . . .

The 20 Hottest Women to Watch on Sports TV



3.) Ines Sainz: Ines is without a doubt one of the hottest sports reporters to date. It's just a shame we don't get to see more of this beauty here in the states. Are you listening, ESPN?



6.) Carrie Millbank: Carrie can be seen as a Sports & Entertainment Contributor for "America's Nightly Scoreboard" on FOX Business Network. (FBN)



11.) Hazel Mae: In 2008, Hazel became the on air-face for the MLB Network.

Complete list here (BleacherReport)

She Sure Has A Funny Way Of Saying How Much She Cares . . . . .

(Bits&Pieces)

More Obvious Reasons To Hate It . . . . .

Apple Tablet: 10 Things We (Already) Hate About You

1. The first version of an Apple product is usually buggy. It's the First Commandment of Apple consumers: Thou shalt not buy the rookie products. "I'd like all the other 'beta testers' to work out the kinks first," one staffer here says. Sometimes, the launch is completely half-baked. Remember the iPhone's debut? Just months after it hit the market, the 4GB version was scuttled and the 8GB version's price dropped. Fact is, there will be a second tablet within months, and the price will inevitably drop. If you simply must have one, wait for it, because you'll be pretty annoyed when see how much it improves.

2. You don't need a giant thousand-dollar smartphone. You've got an iPhone. You've got a laptop. You just received a Kindle for Christmas. Why do you need a tablet? You're probably not sure. Unlike the iPod and the iPhone, this is a product without a clear need. Unless you deliver FedEx packages, you probably don't need a giant mobile touch-screen device. It won't replace your smartphone, which you carry around in your pocket, or your laptop, which needs a keyboard. Will you want to pay nearly $1,000 to carry around a tablet, along with your mobile phone, your work BlackBerry, your laptop, and your Kindle?

3. You're just going to break it, anyway. Picture yourself with your steaming coffee in one hand, your squirming toddler in the other -- and, somehow, your shiny new Apple tablet, playing Sarah Palin's Fox News clips you missed last night until -- gasp -- your precious Apple escapes and plummets to the floor, shattering into a million little pieces. In The Hunt For Red October, sub captain Marko Ramius observes: "Most things in here don't react well to bullets." Don't expect an Apple tablet to react well to almost anything in the world. Water, soda, food, kids, pets: you'll surely figure out a way to damage your new toy sooner or later.

4. Multifunction devices can do a lot -- just not well. Other than your couch, where might your tablet be more useful than what you're using now? Will you use your tablet instead of the PC at your office desk? Will you watch videos on it instead of your flat-screen monitor? Will you use it instead of your smartphone when you're out? No, no, and no.

5. Buy one, and you might as well wear a "Rob Me!" sign. Carrying a tablet around on public transit, on the street, or in a bar is a needless risk -- yet that's precisely where you're expected to use them. Cellphones stow invisibly in your pocket, and laptops fit innocuously into cases, but if you use the tablet as intended -- on the go -- you're just asking for someone to snatch it. Remember those iPod muggings, with those telltale, enticing white earbuds? Think about that whenever you're tempted to watch last night's Daily Show on the New York City subway.

6. The tablet never caught on -- and there's a reason for that. You do not need to buy a new gadget every time Steve Jobs tells you to. The iPod represented a major evolution over the Sony (SNE) Walkman, and the iPhone escalated the smartphone game. But the tablet seems driven by nothing more than desire. Just take a breath...put the tablet down...and back away...slowly.

7. No keyboard, no mouse, no dice. Typing (or "typing") on touchscreens is annoying. How many Tablet buyers will wind up connecting peripheral keyboards and mice? And then...well, what's the point? Besides, mobile devices are only as useful as their battery life. Unless the tablet has more than about six hours of power, it's going to wind up tethered to a wall. Just like your desktop.

8. Netbooks are cheaper. With a glut of netbooks on the market -- with keyboards! -- offering a full Web experience with significantly less sticker shock than the tablet, there's no reason to go there. If you've got the cash for a tablet, you'd be better off with a MacBook Air, a device with far more functionality packed into its three pounds.

9. Something better's coming. With advances in speech recognition, data input will be changing radically over the next few years. Perhaps more importantly, advances in mobile display technology suggest we'll eventually be projecting images and videos on blank walls, or even into space. Or we'll be wearing headsets that project tiny images of the screen into our eyes at close range. In any event, the tablet is an innovation that'll surely be obsolete within a few years.

10. Beware -- Apple also built the world's most infamous paperweight. One word: Newton.

(AOL)

Obvious Reasons To Hate It . . . . . .

(Bits&Pieces)